blog tagging (it's like freeze tag only not at all)

Pondering Hope (isn't that a nice blog name?) tagged me, or in layman's language, politely requested that I share about the book nearest to me at the moment I read the tag.

The instructions: 1. pick up the nearest book (No cheating! Don't try to be cool and find something spectacular. It must be the book in closest physical proximity.) 2. Turn to page 123. 3. Count the first five sentences and then 4. write down the next three sentences:

"It's a wonder you didn't suspect me," I said.

"You're a little too innocent for that yet," my father said affably. "But it won't be long..."

The book was off the free table at the library and is called "The Magic Lantern" and it's written by Robert Carlson. I've never heard of it either, but it came home with me because it was next to a free Walker Percy novel, an author I had heard of and who I had planned to read one day. I haven't decided about reading "The Magic Lantern", but it has a very promising title. At first I was afraid that the nearest book would be my thesaurus, but as luck would have it (or maybe it was magic) "The Magic Lantern" was sitting in the chair next to me.

Much like an email forward that never wants to end I continue this tag by asking Shauna and MALH to share.

Making Easter Dessert

Locate a Logan County Recipe Book. Go to recipe for "Jenny's Delicious Desert". Create list based upon "ingredients" in recipe book making allowances for the penciled in changes which are important since you aren't making Jenny's Delicious Dessert, but another dessert which is called by the family "Awesome Easter Dessert", but which goes by some other name unknown to the family and therefore lost in whatever magazine or recipe book it was first made for the family at Easter. Also substitute the word "walnuts" for "pecans" because you like them better. Grab tote bags and head for the grocery store.

Buy all the listed items. At the nut section, ponder the amount of nuts required because you failed to write a quantity on to your list. Recall the bag of walnuts which you recently threw out of your freezer and assume that you had too many last year. Based upon that, purchase only one 1/2 cup bag of walnuts. While checking out remember to say, "I brought tote bags." Feel very cool in spite of teenage sneer on the bag girl's face. Go home feeling cool about list usage and tote bags.

Take care of work related business. Receive phone call saying that Quesadilla Saturday is on and that you will be fetched shortly. Eat quesadillas.

Stop and see game-watching sibling. Discuss game viewing plans.

Return to house to begin making dessert before important basketball game. Get out ingredients and reread recipe. Realize that the recipe calls for one cup of pecans and you only have a half cup of walnuts. Consider using lesser amount in crust portion of dessert. Determine lesser walnut amount is unacceptable. Realize your pan is at your mom's house. Consider waiting to begin until you retrieve pan. Determine that it is not an option. Besides you've always wanted one of those Pyrex pans with the plastic lids. Purchase walnuts and new Pyrex pan.

Begin following recipe. Remember to preheat oven to 350 degrees. Put crust in pan. Place plan in oven and set timer. Oops. That knob isn't a timer. Set timer with correct knob. Heat up coffee and milk mixture and sit for 15 minutes sipping coffee because you don't have time to make next layer of dessert and get to game watching location. React to ugly buzzing noise from oven by removing pan. Realize pan and oven are cool. Look at knobs. Realize original knob turned was one that was turned from "bake" to "off". Curse. Leave unbaked crust in oven.

Begin driving car. Have idiot throw caramelly frappucinno-thing at your car. Curse.

Retrieve game-watching family member and watch disappointing basketball game. Enjoy(?) elk roast. Visit with family members until 10:30ish. Return home around 11:00.

Cook crust. Begin preparation for next layer. Realize list omitted cream cheese. Go to store and get cream cheese.

Follow modified instructions. Chill.

Wake up late. Arrive at church 15 minutes late. Go to parents' home for lovely meal. Serve dessert and enjoy.

Draft: A User's Guide

I am currently working to develop a user's guide for linda jean. These are guidelines so that perhaps my users will be able to get full enjoyment out of their time with linda jean. I will probably be revising this and will gladly accept any suggestions and requests for clarification:

1. I don't like to argue. If we are arguing I am unhappy. I won't argue about closely held beliefs and it is senseless to argue with me about loosely held beliefs or thoughts I'm expressing. I talk to figure things out not because I've figured things out.
2. I sometimes defend other people's beliefs whether or not I personally believe them. I strongly believe that everyone should be able to have their own point of view and if you disagree with someone you ought to at least try to understand where it is they are coming from.
3. I think that you don't like me. I know you do, but I am insecure. It is a fault that I have accepted will be a lifelong struggle. I am working on it.
4. I want to be cool and I despise that. There is no honor in being cool, but I really like being cool. Even if I think you're cool, it doesn't mean that I respect you.
5. I hate it when people tell me things about myself. I know it's just part of life, but I wish people would at least pretend to want to get information from me. You can ask me about topics if you want to verify the information, but please don't say, "so I hear you're having a rough weekend", or "so I hear you're flying to Paris." I would be much more comfortable if you asked me about my travel plans or asked me how my weekend was going. I'm not sure if this is a reasonable request, I'm just saying that if you want instructions on how to get the most out of your linda jean, it would help.
6. I'll probably never tell you what I think unless you ask directly and even if you do ask I might not tell you, but I won't lie. I really appreciate when people notice that I haven't voiced an opinion instead of assuming they know my opinion based upon my silence.

That's all for now. Look for revisions in the future and let me know if you are interested in instructions for a particular topic.

Crazy

Willie.

When you miss the announcement that Willie Nelson will be in concert locally because you don't listen to the local country music station, and all of the tickets sell out before you hear about it, and someone calls to tell you that they are selling standing room only tickets, you should definitely buy a ticket. You should stand up for a couple of hours and dance a little bit. You should sing along when you know the words. You should definitely go.

Blog as advice column

Dear Blog:
I am working hard to be a typical female. However, I still feel a disconnect between myself and those in my daily life. Though there are a few in this world that I relate to with ease, this is not a daily occurrence. Is feeling typical an unattainable goal? Does everyone seek to feel typical and fail or is there a group somewhere that achieves feeling typical? Is there a substitute feeling that I should be seeking?

Thanks.